I think of blog post ideas all the time and then mentally write them out, but 9 times out of 10 I don’t actually write them down and hit the Publish button. I was thinking about how I don’t like gratitude journals the other day and how I think they’re kind of annoying, so I decided to make this a 1 of out 10 kind of time and write about it.
It’s not that I don’t see the merit in being grateful, and I also don’t want to bash anyone who keeps a gratitude journal- if you like doing it, that’s awesome! It’s just that I personally find them annoying and a chore, and they are one of the many zillions of self-helpy type things I used to make myself do. A major theme of the majority of my 20s was Making Myself Do Things I Don’t Want to Do. Well hey, I’m 30 now, and I’m not wasting my time on that anymore!
To me, writing a gratitude journal feels so forced, and it actually stifles the feelings of gratitude that it’s supposed to be bringing up because I just find it so boring and it feels like I’m doing a homework assignment.
So I don’t do it. I don’t make lists of things I’m grateful for because to me it’s super boring.
I also used to make myself think of things I’m grateful for when something was going wrong because, well that’s what you’re supposed to do right? But that didn’t work for me either! Then I’d kind of just be annoyed that I was tyring to throw some positivity onto my crankiness. Yeah, I’m grateful that I’m healthy and have amazing friends and family, but that doesn’t change the fact that Starbucks ran out of cold brew!! (I know eh, I have a really hard life). No, obviously a lack of cold brew isn’t my only challenge in life, but what I’m trying to say is that sometimes you just need to let yourself be pissed and covering it up with forced gratitude gets you nowhere. I get over things way faster when I just let myself be pissed without trying to guilt myself into focusing on the positive.
I am generally a really grateful person, and I think I can find real happiness in the little things in life, but I feel this when I’m just letting myself be happy rather than writing in a journal or forcing it.
Also, and this sounds kind of weird, but sometimes I think about all of the bad things that haven’t happened to me and that makes me feel really grateful for where I am! Not even big terrible things, but I’ll think things like thank goddd I’m not pregnant or wow, having a broken arm would make things soo annoying right now. And it makes whatever is going on seem not nearly as bad! Like yeah having a rough patch in work is annoying, but having a rough patch at work and an STI? Now that would really suck.
This might be the most random post I’ve ever written, but there you go. Moral of the post? Don’t do things, even things that are supposed to be good for you, that you don’t want to do.